| Twelve ☠ |
[Aug. 27th, 2010|09:49 am] |
Well, it's about that time I think. The ship is all packed up, the wind's on our side today and Jack is making a nuisance of himself in the brig. Not Jack the person, Jack the monkey. I have no idea where Coral's gotten off to but if she doesn't get back here soon we're leaving without her!
Anyway, just wanted to say it's been lovely and all of that sentimental junk. See you all when I'm full of youth and immortality! Except maybe not, if by the time we come back you're all dead. Then I probably won't see you, so it was nice knowing you? We're off to sail the seven seas in search of the fountain of youth! Wish us luck. But not Jack's kind of luck, I really don't want to end up stranded on an island with no rum and two Jack's this time.
... CORAL! THE RUM'S GONE AGAIN! |
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| Eleven ☠ |
[Aug. 2nd, 2010|02:02 pm] |
Remind me never to sign up for anything ever again, no matter how pretty the bonus package.
Three days, no sea turtles. Just a very noticeable shortage of rum and now I have a mysterious rash on my leg.
I hate the jungle. |
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| Ten ☠ |
[Jul. 15th, 2010|10:14 am] |
Wooooo! Argentina loves the gays! Argentina loves the gays! GO GAYS! AND MARRIAGE!
Good job South America, you done good-like! I have the urge to give a gay a big hug. CORAL WHERE ARE YOU? |
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| Nine ☠ |
[Jul. 9th, 2010|01:12 pm] |
Hm. It seems I've misplaced the monkey. Where on earth has that thing gone off to? Coral, I swear to god, if you tried to sell him off to a group of tourists again I will end you.
( Coral ) |
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| Eight ☠ |
[Jun. 27th, 2010|12:26 am] |
Ninety-nine bottles of rum on the wall, ninety-nine bottles of ruuuuumm!
You take one down and pass it around...
CORAL. I could be wrong, but I think I may have just met Cutler Beckett. |
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| Seven ☠ |
[May. 30th, 2010|03:08 pm] |
It's summer! Normally I'd be loaded down with cruise dates by now but I'm actually quite liking this new thing of not having any to speak of. Really don't miss peeling potatoes and rich, white people who think the sun shines out of their asses and underneath my dresssaioefjia302rifopjsclascfkasfaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.123
JACK, DAMNITT, GET OFF THE KEYBOARD!
... Monkeys. |
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| Six ☠ |
[May. 12th, 2010|10:14 am] |
Oh but I have missed the London night life, as well as Spanish plays. Jackson, you're a doll, as ever!
You know what else I've missed? Shiny jewelry. Mmmm. So shiny.
Coral, I don't want to alarm you, but I think the rum's gone. |
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| Five ☠ |
[Apr. 29th, 2010|10:32 am] |
Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me!
We pillage, we plunder, we rifle and loot,
drink up me 'earties, yo ho!
We kidnap and ravage and don't give a hoot,
drink up me 'earties, yo ho!
Coral, we need some rum and a fire stat. And some blue prints! |
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| Four ☠ |
[Apr. 13th, 2010|11:41 am] |
My, my, my Elizabeth. You really are quite the men's lady. Er, I was trying to think of the equivalent to a ladies man. Had a bit too much rum today!
Hmmm. You know, I never really stop to think about it, but I wonder how much it actually bothers her that I don't like cock. Did I just say 'cock'? Coral, take this thing away from me. |
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| Three ☠ |
[Mar. 30th, 2010|09:56 am] |
I must say, staying on the Cosmic Joke is already much preferable to most ships I've been on. For one thing, there aren't any bratty little children running around. That's always appreciated, I really don't like them. I also am not required to wear any sort of ridiculous uniform (no Coral, that is not actually an invitation), peel potatoes and wait on people all day. Ah, the life of a cruise ship laborer is ever so glamorous... For now, I actually don't miss it all that much.
One thing that hasn't changed? There's still a seemingly endless supply of rum within the ship's holdings. Elizabeth doesn't, but I approve. |
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| Two ☠ |
[Mar. 15th, 2010|01:51 am] |
I just had a dream that we crashed into an ice berg. I was actually sorry to wake up.
In other news, I've never hated Disney more. Remind me to never take a job doing anything Disney affiliated every again, the parents are more annoying than the children and I was actually asked to don a corset yesterday. I thought we made it clear that was never happening again? If anyone's going to be falling overboard, it won't be me. |
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| One ☠ |
[Mar. 7th, 2010|03:45 pm] |
There are many things I like about being on a ship. The shitty wireless connection? Definitely not one of them. Or the absolutely irritating people you might meet while on board, the fucking smug bitch I loathe her.
I guess this isn't something Elizabeth even had to deal with in her day though, so I really shouldn't complain. I obviously have it better, and that includes the current company that I keep, which by the way, are none of her old ones.
Anyway, I suppose I should introduce myself since I don't appear to be leaving my room for a bit and I need to occupy myself somehow. The name's Daphne Green and I share some head space with a woman by the name of Elizabeth Swann. If you don't know who that is, you obviously don't get out enough. Or pay attention to what's come out in theaters in the past eight years. And if you call her Elizabeth Turner, I'll cut your balls off, metaphorical or otherwise.
Why did I think a Disney Cruise would be a good career move? We're dying here. |
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